What's it Like to Lose Your Virginity?

Alisha Bridges Sep 12th, 2016 (updated Oct 18th, 2016)
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We asked people of all ages and genders what it was like to lose their virginity. Here are their answers – including facts you need to know.

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I felt weird afterward…
I felt weird afterward…

“I was 14 and she was 17 or 19 I think. I lied about my age, which I could get away with because I looked older. Afterward I felt weird because I wasn’t sure if I liked her, but I knew I wanted to have sex again. I was more so scared she would reject me because I was so nervous I didn’t stay hard the whole time.” Fact: Ten to 20 percent of cases of erectile dysfunction are due to psychological factors.

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She became someone I “caught” feelings for…
She became someone I “caught” feelings for…

“Make sure you care about the person because that individual will always possibly have a connection with you. You will always know their name and how you felt. So cherish the moment and do what feels right, and it’s ok to hold out until you are ready.” Fact: Studies indicate that sexual desire can manifest into love due to regions of the brain that control love and sex.

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I felt strange…
I felt strange…

Fact: The average American girl loses her virginity at 17, but some studies show that based on genetic factors, including impulsivity, some individuals are more willing to wait.I was 23, and it felt weird because I had held out for so long but let go of it so easily. It was nothing like I expected. I let movies and romance novel fantasy cloud my judgment.”

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It can complicate things…
It can complicate things…

“I wish I would have waited until I was in a true committed relationship. I would advise girls to not let the glamour the media portrays of sex fool them.” Fact: From the time we’re very young, we’re barraged with fairy-taledepictions of romantic love in the popular culturemovies and television, books and magazines,recordings and the radio, advertising, and eventhe news.

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I thought I was in love…
I thought I was in love…

“I was 18 years old. During my first time, I felt a lot of pain. I thought that was the way it was supposed to be, and to be honest I didn’t achieve an orgasm until I was 25 years old. But with the first guy, I thought I was in love. I found out later I was not. He wasn’t in love with me either, it was just something for him to do. I also became pregnant the very first time I had sex — I thought he had on a condom.

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Now they have all types of things to protect yourself…
Now they have all types of things to protect yourself…

“If I was a young girl now, I would be careful of having sex. Back in my day we called condoms rubbers, I trusted he put one on, but he hadn’t.” Fact: Back in the early 50’s, the only thing approved to prevent pregnancy were condoms, but a few years later a birth control pill was approved by the Food and Drug Administration. “Now they have all types of things to protect yourself so there is no excuse. Before you give up the “cookie,” you better make sure that man loves you.”

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I became addicted to the sensation…
I became addicted to the sensation…

“I lost my virginity at 15. My feelings for this young lady [were] very intense afterward. I was sexualized at an early age. Seeing sex and hearing about it made me hypersexual.Fact: According to Rand HealthTeens who watch a lot of television with sexual content are more likely to initiate intercourse in the following year.I was exposed to it by older girls.

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I would have changed the setting…
I would have changed the setting…

“I lost my virginity in a Subaru Wagon. But if I could give anybody advice on losing their virginity, it would be to use protection at ALL TIMES.” Fact: The Center of Disease Control reports that 78 percent of female teens and 85 percent of men teens report having used contraceptives the first time they had sex. Eighty-six percent and 93 percent, respectively, say they did so the last time they had sex.

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I only did it because it was a bet…
I only did it because it was a bet…

“I was 16 and I only did it because it was a bet, not because I wanted to. We did it in the bathroom at the movies. I felt a sense of accomplishment, but the experience was not what I expected. I wish I would have waited.”

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If I could go back…
If I could go back…

“My advice to someone considering having sex for the first time would be wait until you are in love.”

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It was a bit too much…
It was a bit too much…

“I was 18 when I lost my virginity, and she was 36. I think I was in love or obsessed. Sex can be similar to a drug—you just continue to chase that high.” Fact: Oxytocin is a hormone release during sex and has been coined as the “love hormone” by those in the medical community. Studies show that oxytocin may increase romantic attachment and empathy.

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Sex is about both people being satisfied…
Sex is about both people being satisfied…

Fact: NBC News Reports that while 75 percent of men always reach orgasm during sex, only 29 percent of women report the same.For women, I’d say you are just as entitled to have a good time as men. Make sure he takes care of you first and let him know if he messes up. For guys, care about the woman’s needs!”

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It was just ok…
It was just ok…

“I was 19 when it happened, and I afterward I felt like “that’s it?” It wasn’t what I expected, and it didn’t hurt as bad as I had heard from my friends. I later found out this was because he had a penis that was smaller than average, so the pain wasn’t as intense. We only had sex once or twice, so when I had sex with a second person whose penis was larger, it did hurt.Fact: The size of an average penis is about 5-7inches.

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He wasn’t a virgin…
He wasn’t a virgin…

“He was much more experienced than me, but I remember having to take the initiative to get things going, I guess he didn’t want to hurt me. He said he had never been with a virgin before. If I could go back I would have waited. It wasn’t as exciting as I had heard.”

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I wonder why I did it…
I wonder why I did it…

I was only a few days away from 16 years old when it happened. I didn’t have any expectations but it was a waste of time until you know your body better.”

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There are so many risks…
There are so many risks…

“I would say wait until you are older because it feels better and you can actually enjoy sex. As a teen there are too many worries and risks that you are not ready for, such as sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.” Fact: One out of four teens will contract an STD, and three out of 10 teens will get pregnant before the age of 20.